It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed,
because his compassions fail not.
They are new every morning:
They are new every morning:
great is thy faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23
I cannot tell you how many times I have said this verse to myself over the past month! There have been nights I have crawled into bed and all I could do was say this verse over and over and hope God would see fit to extend that mercy to me. I've gone through all kinds of crazy emotions, but the one that has irritated me the most is the feeling God is displeased with how I am handling the things that have been thrown at me.
I want so much to be a good example, to trust Him in all things and 'say' I am without fear and despair. But, that isn't the truth. I have been irritable, weepy and very afraid of what is next.
I am, with the Lord's help, fighting to break free knowing full well if I allow myself to stay in a pit, I will develop some serious strongholds in my life. I do NOT want to stay there.
So, day by day I am feeling His mercy and grace and He's picking me back up. I don't like the way things are. I don't like the fact that I have this giant hole in my heart. But, God is still good and still faithful to pick me up.
Because of his great mercy, I am not consumed!
3 comments:
I am SO right here with you. Thank you for sharing this because I know I needed to hear it.
Sweet Siesta,
I want you to know that you are in my prayers and thoughts. Our God is faithful and He loves you so much. Keep being honest with him. He is near the broken hearted. I have been praying Eph 3:16 for you: that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will grant you MIGHTY inner strength through his holy spirit. I hope I can hug you in Houston in Jan!
Remember, this is the same God who delights over you! Do not let Satan worm his way in by insinuating that you are a disappointment to God. Satan promotes shame, God promotes earnest repentance and forgiveness. God gave you a tender heart that causes you to miss your friend, and God will use this time to His glory in the future - perhaps when you comfort someone else who is hurting. Keep clinging to His promises!
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